I have two children Vivien, 7 and Max, 5. At this age it's pretty easy to take time to myself. I work from home writing for Stretching Canvas and International Tattoo Art Magazines, run an art gallery called Big Car. This fall I'm going back to school for nursing at University of Indianapolis. 

The first 4 years of having children were difficult. Vivien was colicky and I don't think I ever put her down. As a matter of fact before I had Vivien I thought co-sleeping was creepy but after having Vivien I couldn't see why anyone wouldn't co-sleep. Our families thought we were freaks. As Jim said "I was never allowed in my parents 'secret do it room.' But we never had any problems getting them in their own beds or finding time to have sex. We just didn't do it in our room at night. Our children aren't needy or clingy. Quite the opposite. I personally don't think there is one right way to raise children or that everyone should sleep with their kids. It's what worked for us. I believe good people raise good people. 

In 2003 my mother got very ill with cancer soon after Max was born, she went through numerous surgeries, chemo and radiation. So the children grew up seeing my mom very sick and Max thought she looked like a skeleton, he would run his finger along the cuts on her neck over and over. The children and I stayed out there. Max became rather preoccupied with skeletons in general.  Vivien who was 4 by then would say to my mom, "I remember when you looked normal." It was the most difficult period in my life. But my mother slowly got better and in 2004 I started writing freelance. I also started running more art and music shows at Big Car.

It was a gradual process the way the children and I have become more independent of each other. I think that must be what parenting is, this constant process of them letting go and you letting go but never completely. And I suspect I'll always need them more than they need me.